New Mommy Talk

So I was thinking today.. I've only been on this journey of motherhood for 3 months and I have already learned a ton! Which things work, which things are super hard that I thought would be easy, which things are easy that I thought would be hard, which things I will do/not do with my next child, and so on and so forth! I do know there is an element that "every baby is different", and other influential factors, so maybe all of these things I 'think' I know now will not be true when/if we have more children! :) I've caught myself thinking things like 'Oh yeah, I'll remember this for the next one' -but who are we kidding? I think the term is "mom brain". So yeah, I WILL forget them.
       I decided I want to compile a list of random things that I want to remember in case they come handy in the future, & maybe some of my mommy-to-be friends can think about this stuff that I didn't think about before my sweet Evelyn came!  But, be reminded, everyone might not agree on every little thing here, but like I said this is just what has worked for us so far, or what has not worked and I would do differently! To be completely honest I hesitated for a while before posting this, because I definitely do not want to come across like I've got all the answers and have it all together. I'm a rookie. I am in NO WAY an expert on anything, especially being a baby momma! So now that another wordy disclaimer is out of the way I guess I can get to it ;)

• Do not rock the baby to sleep every night. Yes, I just heard you gasp. But no, the first week or so home, I did rock her to sleep when it was bed time and after middle of the night feedings, and I think that for the first week or so home that is fine! Everything is so new for you and for the little one who's been living in his or her own personal, dark, sound muffled, warm, cozy swimming pool for all of his/her life! But after that window of adjustment, put the baby down awake! Not fully awake & alert, but not asleep. Then they will learn from the beginning how to soothe themselves to sleep without the aid of being held or rocked. It is rough the first several nights, because they will cry. Yes, babies DO cry, and it's OKAY! ( maybe I am just reassuring myself here :P). But for Evelyn, after a rough first few nights she now goes to sleep on her own no problem at night and after night feedings usually without a peep. But I don't want myself to be so hard-set on this 'rule' of mine. I know she is only so little once and I want to be able to rock my baby to sleep, so I sometimes I do. And that's okay. This is just a habit that worked to get her to go to sleep well :)
• Put baby down for naps in the crib! That is, if your eventual goal is to have baby take naps in her crib. This is one that I wish I would have done differently. The first few weeks newborns are sooo sleepy they take like 8 naps a day, and basically snooze in an out of consciousness all day long. But again, this is after that super-new-sleepy-baby stage the first couple weeks. I had been putting Evelyn in this cozy, reclined, vibrating thingy for her naps. And she 9 times out of 10 would go down for her naps without any fussing and just go to sleep within 5 minutes. (I would, too, if I had my own cushy vibratey bed!) But around 4-5 weeks, Evelyn was now sleeping in her crib upstairs at night, and I wanted her to nap there too.  So I ended up just getting really frustrated because in the crib she would cry from anywhere from 5-15 minutes before falling asleep, and she had never before! And as soon as I started to swaddle her in her blanket she would start crying like she knew the horrible torture I was about to put her through. And that breaks a mommy's heart! :( So I would just move her naps to the crib earlier. Sometimes she still naps in her swing, or while someone is holding her, but again these are general, flexible, rules that CAN have exceptions :)
• Allow baby time each day to play by themselves. Evelyn loves her little play mat she lays on with toys dangling above her. I started her playing on it everyday at about 3 weeks probably. At that point they definitely do not intentionally "play". Their cute little arms and legs still have a mind of their own. But its fun as they grow to see them start to look at the toys, and hit them with their flailing arms, and now Evelyn is at the age where she intentionally grabs and grasps onto them and loves it! She could keep herself happily entertained for 45 minutes, and maybe longer if I let her!
• Do tummy time! Every day, starting as soon as you bring them home from the hospital! At first they can only handle 3-5 minutes of it because their big heads are so stinkin' heavy & its hard work! And Evelyn usually cried the first few weeks. But as their little necks get stronger they can do it for longer periods of time and before you know it they can hold their heads up without even bobbling and even enjoy it! Evelyn really like tummy time (usually!) now and can hold her head up very well.
• A consistent daily schedule aids baby in sleeping through the night earlier and makes each day (somewhat) predictable. I won't post our daily schedule because this post is already way too long and If you haven't passed out from boredom yet, that would do it!
• TAKE LOTS AND LOTSA PICTURES! Self-explanatory :)
• Enjoy even the tough moments. Its easy to get frustrated and wish time away, like "I can't wait til she sleeps through the night' or 'I can't wait til she can sit up' or whatever that next milestone is. Those things are great and good to look forward to...but enjoy them each and every stage because it does fly by. I feel like I don't have any credibility to say any of these things because we're talking only 3 months now :P But I still think it's true!
• Don't expect to have all the answers and solutions to everything that comes up.  This is a toughie for me! This whole process is nothing but a moment by moment learning experience!
• which leads me to: Be willing to ask for and accept help.
• STAY CALM. Even the fussiest baby cannot cry forever. :)

Well there are a few of the thoughts bouncing around my head today. Hope I didn't bore you to tears! Feel free to post helpful hints/tricks/tips that worked for you as you raised or are raising your kiddos!